Well, I don’t. Gotta say that as a starting place. Any attempt to understand the workings of god has always left me confused. Has always revealed to me, at a later date, a way in which my limited mind hadn’t quite wrapped itself around the whole picture. My attempts to explain have always been inadequate in the long run.
Sometimes, for a while, I have a working knowledge. A sense of understanding. Then along comes life and the understanding is insufficient. I’m beginning to wonder if perhaps understanding isn’t the way to relationship, to peace, to freedom.
Recently, I’ve been going through a very dry time. My experience of prayer feels too small. Limited in scope. Most of my prayer has been of the asking for help kind. For myself or for others. Some gratitude. But mostly help. Somehow this seems to be in response to seeing/experiencing life as a problem to be solved. And god as the problem solver. So, I’ve begun to ask myself what might prayer be like if it wasn’t about solving problems. What might my life be like if I didn’t see it as a problem to be solved? In what ways would I see/feel/experience things differently? What if I saw all of life as something to be experienced? As part of the great mystery. All of life…
Trust the process. Sit and observe carefully, lovingly. With an open mind. With an open heart. Ask the question, “What is it that I’m certain I know?” And what is knowing? Or as Katagiri Roshi is said to have said, “Are you sure?”
3 comments:
Hi! Your post reminded me of something I've heard before: The ego likes to solve problems. When there aren't problems to solve, it creates them.
How funny... I read your post and thought I should try to "solve" your problem haha! Here's a link I found interesting:
http://everydaywonderland.com/articles/no-self-no-problem
that was me - lindsay m. -
Another way I look at this is through opportunity versus burden. I can easily get stuck in the trap of thinking about problems to which I am aversive as burdens. But I don't have to think of them that way! Everything can be an opportunity. :)
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